Posts by carlo5

Would you Adam and Eve it

Once upon a time there were two people, one was called Adam and the other one was called Eve, Adam was a man and Eve was a woman. They lived in a place called the Garden of Eden, it was a really nice place with plants and trees and beautiful scenery, there were no high rise buildings or motorways and they didn’t even have a Mcdonalds, but despite this they were both happy.   God owned the...

Read More

Alfie dog

INTERNAL – LIVING ROOM A POLICEMAN IS TALKING TO A WOMAN. Policeman: When did you last see your dog? Woman: I let him out straight after he had his food, as I always do, it was about twenty past seven just before Coronation Street started. Policeman: And that was on the 3rd of September? Woman: Yes, 6 days ago. Policeman: And you have not seen him since? Woman: I called him and called him,...

Read More

The goldfish

BRANDON AND HIS MOTHER ARE RETURNING A GOLDFISH TO THE COCONUT SHY MAN, THE GOLDFISH IS IN A BAG DEAD. Mother: Excuse me, we won this goldfish on your stall yesterday, and within four hours of taking it home it was dead. Man: It doesn’t look like one of my goldfish love. Are you sure you had it from here? Woman: Yes I am sure, I have a picture on my phone of my son winning it outside your...

Read More

White patio chairs

EXTERNAL – GARDEN 2 PATIO CHAIRS IN THE MIDDLE OF A LAWN Chair 1: I hate being a chair Chair 2: So you keep saying Chair 1: Well come on, you can’t exactly say that it’s a good life can you? Chair2: We are not alive, we are chairs I keep telling you, we are just practical pieces of garden furniture. Chair 1: How come we can talk then? Chair 2: I don’t know the answer to that. I told you...

Read More

The plumber

INTERNAL – KITCHEN.   A PLUMBER IS IN THE BATHROOM FIXING THE TOILET, THE HOUSEHOLDER A WOMAN IS SAT DOWNSTAIRS WAITING FOR HIM TO FINISH, HE HAS BEEN IN THERE FOR SEVERAL HOURS AND SHE CAN HEAR HIS FRUSTRATION.   HE FINALLY FINISHES AND WALKS DOWNSTAIRS TO THE LIVING ROOM.   Woman:  Hope everything was all right up there, I could hear you banging away at the pipes.   Plumber: Yes it’s...

Read More